currently: I either feel like shit or it's PMS

*listening to Haujobb*

Tests incoming:

My profession is Final Fantasy video game heroine! My name is Fyx. I am a spunky magic halfbreed, with green hair and orange eyes. My goals in life are to pester the game's generic villain and steal some valuable relic. My love interest is an incurably cheerful doctor with stunning blue eyes and a personality split. Take the idle profession quiz yourself!

take the "what's my fault" quiz.
(and then browse around mewing.net. because laura is cool.)

I said:
When you know someone that well, when you know all their flaws and the negative aspects of their personality, being attracted to them is nearly impossible. For me, anyway.

Kuroiko said:
So you're saying that you can't ever really get to know someone well, particularly a significant other, because then all the attraction would go out of the relationship? That is...so fucked-up. Not that I have any room to talk, seeing as I'm Ms. Never Let Anyone Close at All. -_-;

I say:
No, that was just the case with him. Friends are just friends for a reason. You love them, you think you trust them, etc etc. But with intimacy that would make you more than friends. I don't even fucking care right now to bother talking about it. I'm really bitchy/indifferent at the moment. When ya really think you're in love, even the person's flaws are cute. That's how I always knew that I didn't like Justin that way. I couldn't get past his flaws.

pooped up squak

Follow me down.
I'll not break you, I promise.
I want to ripen you in the sun.
Then devour you.

I really hope this is PMS. As sad as that seems, considering I want to rip my ovaries and uterus out with a cork screw.... I don't want this to just be random depression fucking with me. argh.

Aren't I a bright ray of sunshine?

memories are violated
unexpected light
neon redline glare above
too close to very nearly dead

random shadows precise echoes
drumming of a helicopter
accepted version remixed man
drumming of a helicopter

magnetic faint clicks
more a feeling than a sound
crawling video screens
reflecting my panic eyes

random shadows precise echoes
drumming of a helicopter
accepted version remixed man
drumming of a helicopter

Unseeing/Haujobb

your authentic fake makes me laugh.

All that I want and adore.... so much filth on the doorstep. I close my heavy eyelids and open them once more to let the glow of the monitor shine on my tired blues. I'm ruined.

I miss innocence.