All things considered, I'd like to forget all the bad things. Today, my mind was open. I'm unsure why. I do know that my worries, however small, were cast aside and everything seemed cleaner. I know that tomorrow will be different. Tomorrow is always different.
Isn't it delightful knowing things can go well or poorly, depending on the events leading up to them? Or just by chance...?
standing on the bridge that crosses the river that goes out to the sea
the wind is full of a thousand voices that pass by the bridge and me
I weave the wire of my headphones around my fingers and over my lips. I can taste the electricity.
I smelled cancer on a young woman. Does she know?
When I open my robe and place my hands over my heart, I wonder how deep it hides and what it would take to find out. But the curiousity is more for the non-physical functions of the heart. Yes, I feel it beating against my cold hands. But why does it ache and murmur to me, "It's all gone horribly wrong, you know? It's all gone horribly wrong?" I wish I had an answer for you, my fist-sized friend. All I can do is cradle you and hope things will be better for you someday. Maybe someday. As if it's some separate entity, right. No, it's me, I'm afraid.
*"Tango to Evora"*
If I turn around, I see that the path from whence I came is blocked. Rocks came crumbling down and have obscured even the memory of trodding along happily. If I look ahead, I see road signs. One reads, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." Another reads, "This is the end, beautiful friends, the end."
And the last sign, a dirty thing nearly hidden under leafless bushes, reads, "50 rocks in your head, 50 paces."
Esoteria wins again!
I must go now.... I work in under 5 hours.
2:00pm
currently: 
argh
*listening to Marilyn Manson, Antichrist Superstar*
I hate work. I hate work. I hate work. I hate condescending pricks. I hate not getting an inch of respect. I hate people who put a band-aid on a floodgate and hope it will hold.
Hi. How was your day?
I just got home a lil' bit ago. I'm trying to work out my anger. Mmm yes. Pigtails and loud music and a chain around my neck. I should go kill stuff on my new game. Ragnarok has made me completely forget about Arc the Lad. Oh, well. And I was close to beating ff8 again... eh, it can wait.
Shit. I need sleep. Murr. 2 hours Sun night, a small nap yesterday, and 2 hours last night just isn't cutting it. Should I nap now or later? Going to the gym tonight. FOO. FOOO I say! You're such a dirty dirty rock star.
...
If I can't have you then no one will
What?
I just remembered something from Saturday night. When I told Lonelyfox I was IMing Rask and told him to say hi, Lonelyfox said, "Tell him 'you gave up the best thing to happen in your life... so hi.'" Careful, Lonelyfox, that almost borders on flattery. I think. There was some mumbling after that, but I was caught off guard, so it didn't register. Drat.
Now, I must play my soul-sucking game, regardless if I have any soul left to suck.
bottoms up