nani o shimashou ka

blargh.

currently: fine/not fine

Mm ice cream. I used to know a boy that loved ice cream.

Go on, now, love. Go back to your wife.

Singin' la da da da

Every now and then, I have to communicate like my thoughts sound in my own head. And now for something completely different:

i still recall the taste of my tears
echoing your voice just like the ringing in my ears
my favorite dreams of you still wash ashore
scraping through my head 'till i don't want to sleep anymore
come on tell me
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i just want something
i just want something i can never have

you always were the one to show me how
back then i couldn't do the things that i can do now
this thing is slowly taking me apart
grey would be the color if i had a heart
come on and tell me
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make this all go away
i just want something
i just want something i can never have

in this place it seems like such a shame
though it all looks different now, i know it's still the same
everywhere i look you're all i see
just a fading fucking reminder of who i used to be
come on tell me
make this all go away
you make this all go away
i'm down to just one thing
and i'm starting to scare myself
you make this all go away
you make it all go away
i just want something i can never have
i just want something i can never have

Sugar and nicotine OD eminate.

The ... mm ice cream...
er, where was I?

Oh, I watched Memento earlier.

Once in a while, I get the urge to trip through links to other diaries and other diaries and so on. I come across these diary review sites. I see no point in them, honestly. And nearly every review I've read for someone's diary has been negative or holier-than-thou. What's funnier than this is that diary writers actually ask for their diaries to be reviewed. Nevermind the reviewer has no grasp of grammar and punctuation. Nevermind critics in general are usually shallow people. Whatever gets you hard.

Hurrah. I'm shallow for other reasons. I dove in the shallow end of the pool one too many times.

Crap, I knew I forgot something. A cd came out tues. that I wanted.

working my hands until they bleed

I started writing up a resignation/two week notice for work. Even if I don't use it, it's cathartic and feels good to write. I've even refrained from swearing. How professional.

Maybe you'll be seduced tonight. Maybe you'll be sedated. Maybe I'll learn when to keep my mouth shut.

6:06 p.m.

currently: grrph

Any time I try to be honest with my mother, I might as well pour salt into my eyes. She came over a little while ago, wanting me to help her with an iddy biddy digital voice recorder. So, I did. Then, she began her regular rant. Things didn't go so well after that. She tried to lay the guilt on thick to protect herself, per usual. I said I'd had enough, for she was making me feel like baked shit on a sidewalk. She left soon after. I felt like saying, "You're not the only one with problems in the world." But any time I even hint at that, she steers the attention back at herself. I don't know what else to do short of running into the street screaming. I wish I had a mother I could talk to about my problems, but hers are all that matter to her.

I'm not happy, Mommy. Sometimes I wake up crying. And you're never there to tell me everything is okay. No one's there.

saa

3:34 p.m.

currently: love my tail

*listening to music from Rurouni Kenshin*

That reminds me, I need to order those two Kenshin DVD's, so I can catch up. I have 5 I can't watch! wah!

Murr.

Maybe I'll get some Niea Under 7, too.

Myaaaaaa. *stretch* I slept too late.

For some reason, Guns'n'Roses' "You Could be Mine" is going through my head. Well, that and Nine Inch Nails' "I Just Want Something I Can Never Have."

Back away... slowly.

Ah, btw, Wolf Man has a diary now. (and I made a basic layout for him) Go see it NOW.